Bacchic Effects
by vardaquareien
Summary: Chloe and Lana get drunk at the Talon leading to eventual smutty Chlex. Challenge response. Please R&R!
1. Default Chapter

Title: Bacchic Effects. 

Author: vardaquareien 

Rating: R eventually! 

Disclaimer: Smallville and charcters aren't mine. Just borrowing. Will give back. Maybe. 

Notes: First of all this is my first fanfic ever so I want complete honesty! Any comments and/or criticisms will only make me stronger! Tell me if you think I suck and why. 

This fic is in response to challenge #23 at naughty-seduction (sent in by Brittany). I will post the complete challenge plot & requirements at the end of the fic coz they're fairly detailed and will give everything away if I post them here. 

Summary: Chloe and Lana get drunk at the Talon leading to eventual smutty Chlex. 

Bacchic Effects.

"Chloe! What do you think you're doing?!" Lana hissed, looking at her friend apprehensively. 

Chloe looked up at Lana with an evil grin on her face. "What's it look like. I'm beginning the process of getting good and smashed!" She poured a liberal amount of whiskey into her coffee mug. "The only thing better than coffee is Irish coffee. Top o' the morning to ya!" She raised the mug in Lana's direction before taking a large gulp of the liquid inside. 

"It's evening, and you can't drink that here!!!" Lana gestured frantically around the empty Talon. "We're still open!" 

"So close! It's not like there's anybody here. And..." Looking at her wristwatch "it's only 40 minutes 'till closing time anyway." Chloe downed the rest of her mug, grinning at Lana once again. "You wanted me here for some girly - type bonding then you'll just have to accept the fact that I don't _do_ girly. At least not without a lot of liquor first!" She grinned to herself, silently adding that she felt the need for a good stiff drink every time she was in Lana's presence for an extended period of time. 

She watched as Lana went through some kind of internal debate. "Where'd you get it from anyway?" Lana asked gesturing to the scotch bottle on the counter. 

"Oh I just happened to find it lying around" Chloe returned casually. Seeing Lana's raised eyebrow and stern look she continued "It was in the back of the pantry this morning when I was searching for the coffee filters. And before you say it" she anticipated as Lana began to open her mouth again "No. My father will not notice it gone. I happen to know that he can't stand the stuff and it's been sitting there since someone at the plant gave it to him about three years ago for his birthday." She gave Lana a 'so there' look, daring her to hassle the spunky blonde further. 

Lana, never too perceptive at the best of times, didn't let it go at that. "But Chloe. You're only 17. You're underage and -" 

"You've never had alcohol before have you?" Chloe interrupted her lecture with a smirk. She hopped up from her stool and strode over to the front door of the Talon, kicking it shut and locking it before flipping the sign to Closed. " I get to corrupt my first minor!!!" Chloe clapped her hands together. "This night is going to be more fun than I thought!" Practically dancing in glee, she returned to the counter and added a good portion of scotch to Lana's half depleted coffee mug before refilling her own. "Bottoms up!" She gulped the fiery liquid before watching Lana study the cup in front of her. 

"I really don't think-" 

"Oh come on Lana. Live a little! It's Friday night and it's not like there's anything better to do in this miserable town." Lana took a deep breath before tentatively taking a sip of her own drink. "There you go! Just a bit more." Chloe coaxed her then chuckled at the face Lana pulled after tasting the concoction. "What?" She asked innocently "it's Scotch. I never said it tasted any good. No one drinks Scotch for the taste and anyone who's told you they like it is a liar. It's disgusting." She stated before taking another gulp from her own mug. 

Lana coughed. "H-how on earth can you drink it straight like that?" She asked before bravely taking a gulp of her own 'Irish' coffee. 

"It's all in the technique. Start out with 'Irish' coffee until you feel it start to take effect. By then you don't give a fuck what you're drinking" Gesturing rather wildly with the same hand that was holding her drink, it splashed out of the mug and all over Chloe's leg. "Whoops!" 

Lana noticed for the first time that the bottle on the counter was about one third empty. " OK. Am I right in guessing that this was full before you started?" To Chloe's amazement Lana grinned "I'd better get busy and catch up then, hadn't I?" 

Chloe watched in amusement as Lana guzzled the entire contents of her mug down before setting about making some more coffee. "I'm not brave enough yet to try it straight" she admitted. 

Not being used to alcohol of any form Lana was already starting to feel the effects of the whiskey she'd already drunk. Looking at the bottle again she was amazed that Chloe still seemed fairly unaffected by the amount she'd consumed. "She must really be able to hold her alcohol" Lana mused. Then turning to look at the blonde girl across the counter from her she observed Chloe concentrating very hard on pouring some more Scotch into her mug. "Hmm maybe she's not as unaffected as I thought" she decided. 

"So Chloe, seeing as you keep assuring me that you're totally over you crush on Clark Kent, tell me who the lucky man is that has succeeded in capturing the affections of our fair maiden." 

Chloe snorted. "I should have known. Get a fairy princess drunk and she reverts to thees and thous!!!" 

"Hmph!" Lana made a rather insulted sound. 

"Ok, ok I'm sorry! I told you I'm not good with the girly bonding thing. Any way who says that _any_ man has captured my affections? I'm a modern woman of the twenty-first century I don't need a man!" 

A look that Chloe never imagined she would ever see on the prissy pink princess crossed Lana's face. "Of course you don't. I'm just imagining the sounds I've heard coming from your bedroom in the middle of the night. 'Oh yes don't stop! I need you so much baby-'" 

Lana was cut off from her teasing when Chloe jumped out of her chair lunging unsteadily for her, knocking them both to the floor in the process. Both girls looked at each other a moment before bursting out laughing. 

"Still doesn't prove nufin!" Chloe slurred. "I jus happen to be a sexual bean. Doesn't mean I'm maginin it's L-" she quickly shut her mouth praying that Lana's usual unperceptiveness had been enhanced by the liquor she had consumed. 

Lana furrowed her brow in concentration and Chloe had to bite back a laugh at the amusing sight of Lana Lang so obviously attempting to think. "You were just about to say a name!" Lana looked as though she had found the cure to cancer. "So that means I was right. It must also be someone I know if you don't want to tell me who it is." She wrinkled her brow again. "Hmm someone I know whose name begins with L. Is it that guy Lenny in trig class? You know I've seen him looking at you!" 

This time Chloe made no attempt to stifle her laughter. "Yes Lana, I'm desperately in love with Lenny Finch. He makes me so horny. I don't know which turns me on more his unwashed hair or that dirty jacket he never seems to take off." 

"Fine, make fun." Lana crossed her arms sulking. "But I don't know anyone else whose name starts with - ahhhhh!!! You don't! You can't possibly!" She shrieked. 

Chloe gulped. Great, once Lana knew she'd never hear the end of it! 

"I can't believe you've got the hots for Lionel Luthor! He's so hairy and disgusting and-" 

"OLD!!! Lana I can't believe you could even consider Lionel Luthor as a possible candidate for my affections. You must really have a low opinion of me!" 

"Sorry it's just that-" Lana stopped, looking at Chloe rather nervously. "Chloe, "she began hesitantly. "It's...it's not _me_ is it?" 

Chloe looked horrified for a moment before bursting out into uncontrollable gales of laughter. She began rolling around on the floor clutching her stomach. 

"Oh good" Lana looked relieved, then suddenly offended. "Hey, what's wrong with me?" 

Chloe continued guffawing. "That's what we'd all like to know" she giggled under her breath before being forced to stop laughing due to an attack of hiccups. Raising her voice she attempted to soothe the other girl "So -hic- sorry Lana it's jus -hic- that you're not re-hic-really my type -hic!" 

"So who is. Hey! If it's not Lionel Luthor, how about _Lex_ Luthor!" Lana looked like the cat that caught the canary. "Chloe li-ikes Le-ex! Chloe li-ikes Le-ex!" She chanted in an annoying singsong voice. 

"I DO NOT!" Chloe yelled, her hiccups disappearing as suddenly as they had begun. Chloe frowned at Lana who was still keeping up her chant before entertaining a deliciously evil thought. " I do _not _like Lex Luthor. I'm totally in lust with the guy!" Lana's singing suddenly stopped as she stared at Chloe, amazed. "I want to run his smooth, bald head all over my body. I want to rip his designer clothing off him and lick his entire body before slowly bringing the most powerful man in Smallville to his knees. Literally and figuratively!" 


	2. Chapter Two

A/N: Thanx for the lovely reviews! Keep 'em coming!

Chapter Two:

Lana continued to stare at Chloe. 

"What? The guy is a total fox. Anyone with a discernible amount of oestrogen in their body has to have had similar thoughts about the man!" Chloe grinned at Lana who was now staring at her open-mouthed. "That is, excluding you of course. We all know that you're too hung up on a certain dumb farm boy to notice anyone else. Even if the most gorgeously sexy man in Smallville were to dance naked in front of you, you'd simply ask him to move over as he was obstructing your view of Clark!" 

"That's not true! I admit that whilst I may have feelings for Clark, I _have_ noticed that Lex is an attractive man. An attractive man who is not only _my_ boss but also your dad's!!!" She raised her eyebrows at Chloe "Not only that, he's 5 years older than you and a billionaire to boot!" 

"In other words...Chloe, you haven't got a flying snowball's chance in hell with him. Don't think I don't know that. I'm a teenager whom high school boys don't even find attractive, let alone a real man." She sighed. Of course she knew that there was no chance for her and Lex - it just didn't help to have Lana come right out and say it like that. 

"That's not true Chloe you're very attractive!" Lana patted Chloe's arm soothingly. 

"Um Lana, I thought we'd already discussed this. I don't lean that way!" She gave Lana a small grin, trying to lighten her own mood. 

As the two girls chuckled, a sharp noise made them look towards the front of the store. There, with his nose pressed up against the glass was Clark, peering in at them with a concerned look on his face. 

"Oh just fucking peachy. Look Lana, here's your own personal knight in shining flannel to saving you from my corrupting influence! It's the perfect opportunity for him to practice his Jonathan Kent - like morality orations. " 

"Shit! What's he doing here?" Chloe raised an eyebrow at her. "What? It's not like I have to have him around every minute of the day!" Chloe just raised her eyebrow even further. "Oh shut up!" 

"OK ten bucks says that you let Clark in before ten minutes are up." 

"Your on!" Lana attempted to shake Chloe's hand but neither was coordinated enough at this point to manage the action successfully. "Clark piss off!" Lana yelled towards the front door. 

"Lana! Chloe! Are you all right? What's going on?" Clark started banging on the front door. "Lana! Why is the Talon closed?" He peered inside again and saw what appeared to be the two girls lying on the floor. Beginning to get worried he knocked harder. "Are you two all right? Do you need help? Just let me in!" 

Chloe turned her head to look at Lana. "You better go talk to him before he breaks down the door trying to save you." 

Lana sighed. "But I'm comfable here. I don't wanna get up! You go!" 

"Get fucked! He's your imaginary boyfriend! I'm not movin!" Chloe folded her arms across her chest with a determined look on her face. "'Sides you've gotta earn your ten bucks girl. Make the bugger piss off, he's getting annoying." 

Lana slowly made a move to stand up. After several attempts she succeeded, though somewhat unsteadily. Reaching down to Chloe she pulled the other girl's hand, trying to get her to stand up. "'f I'm gettin up den you are too!" She said whilst tugging at Chloe's arm. Chloe strove to ignore Lana's insistent pulling but eventually gave in. 

"Fine. The sooner he goes, the sooner I get to be comfable again!" Lurching to her feet, she followed Lana across the room to the door, chugging on the bottle of scotch as she went. 

"Goway Clark. Az you can see we're fine. Now bugger off!" Lana told him not altogether coherently. 

Clark look taken aback at Lana's words. Something was definitely wrong with this picture and he was going to find out what! He noticed that Chloe was standing behind Lana with a silly grin on her face. Clark opened his mouth to ask her what was going on when he saw her take a swig from a large bottle that he hadn't noticed her holding. "Chloe! That's whiskey!" He exclaimed in a shocked voice. 

"Ding, ding, ding. The boy's a bona fide genius!" Chloe retorted. 

"Just open the door so that I can help you two get home. I can't believe that your drunk! Lana I would have expected better from you. This is your place of work! I can't believe you closed the Talon early to get drunk!" 

"Oh fuck, he's switched into all out Jonathan mode! Notice he expects better from you Lana but with me it's no surprise?" Chloe grinned at him. "Am I a baaad girl Clark?" She asked pouting and looking down at her feet seeming for all the world like a chastened schoolgirl. That is, if one had not noticed the mischievous gleam in her eye. "Maybe we will have to let you in. Coz bad girl's need spankin!" Lana giggled at the blush that Chloe's teasing has caused to spread across Clark's face. "Will you spank me Clark? Coz I been very naughty!!!" 

"I thought there was someone else you'd rather have spank you!" Lana simpered, turning to look at Chloe. At Lana's sly reference to Lex, Chloe's eyes glazed over and a satisfied smirk appeared on her face. 

"Mmm" she moaned "now that is one delectable thought." She looked up at Clark and grinned once again. "Bye Clark. Seems your not needed at all!" With that, she pulled the blinds on the door, shutting Clark off from view. 

Clark stood for a moment in shock. He could not believe that they had refused to let him in! What on earth was he going to do now? Obviously, with his powers he would have easily been able to break down the door. However, that would mean a lot of uncomfortable questions. Questions not only from the two girls inside, who in their inebriated state may not notice his extraordinary actions, but also from Lex who would invariably want to know why Clark had vandalised his business. 

"Of course" Clark thought suddenly. "Lex! He would have a key and be able to get in!" All he would have to do is go to the mansion and get Lex to give him the key. Hmm hopefully he'd be able to persuade Lex to help him get the two girls home as well. Heading toward his truck, Clark shook his head. Gee that was going to be fun! At least they wouldn't have to deal with explaining everything to Gabe, who was currently on a business trip. 

Inside the Talon, Lana watched as Chloe staggered back towards the counter, then began moving around behind it, obviously searching for something. "Lana where's the phone?" 

"Whatcha doin Chlo?" Lana tried to follow Chloe's path across to the counter but the bar stools kept jumping in her way, impeding her mision. 

"Well seeing as I asked where the phone was, I thought I'd make a cup a coffee with it! Honestly, what do you usually do with a phone?!" Chloe shook her head and proceeded to take the lid off a sugar bowl and stick her nose in. Upon finding that the phone was not actually hiding in the sugar bowl, she looked extremely disgruntled, as though the phone failing to materialise was a personal affront. 

"Yeah, but who you callin?" Lana asked, pointing to the phone that was sitting on the counter next to Chloe's elbow. 

Chloe glared at the phone. "How'd it get there?" She muttered in a somewhat bemused tone. Then looking up at Lana she grinned. "I'm gonna call Sexy Lexy. I've been a naughty girl and I need to be spanked!" She picked up the receiver then stared at it for a second. "Oh shit. I need one of those numbery things. Have you got one?" 

"'Course I got one! It's the same as yours. I live at your place 'member?" 

Chloe scrunched up her face in confusion. "What's Lex doing at my place?" 

"How'd you know he's at your place?" 

"You just said he was!" Chloe nearly dropped the phone as she gestured wildly towards Lana. 

"No I didn't. You asked what my phone number was!" Lana pointed her finger at Chloe accusingly, almost taking out Chloe's eye in the process. Chloe crinkled her face in concentration. 

"What's your phone numbery thing got to do with Lex?" 

"I don't know!" Lana declared with exasperation. She sat down on a stool and laid her head in her hands. "What're we talkin 'bout anyway?...I think I need another drink." She grabbed the whiskey bottle that Chloe had left on the counter nearby, and took a large gulp before shuddering. "Erg. That stuff's horrid!" 

"I don't know what your talkin 'bout, but _I_ wanna call Lex." She stopped for a second and bit her lip."Can't remember why though." 

"Spankin!" Lana offered. 

"Ooh that's right!" Again Chloe chewed on her bottom lip in thought. "I know!" She screamed suddenly, making Lana fall off her stool. "I'll ring the oprate-, oprartat-, person who lives in the phone! They know what the numbery thing is!" Chloe placed the receiver to her ear and listened for a moment. "The person that lives in the phone's humming at me! Listen!" She held the phone up to Lana's ear. 

"That's not the person in the phone. That's the tone in the phone." Lana announced decidedly, nodding her head with conviction. 

"Where's the person then?" Chloe put the phone back to her own ear, upside down. "HELLO! Hello? Person in the phone I wanna speak to Lex!" She yelled into the earpiece. Then, becoming entangled in the phone cord, Chloe fell with a resounding crash to the floor. In the resulting scuffle the phone line became disconnected. "Humph! Stupid bloody cord tried to strangle me!" Putting the receiver back to her ear she sighed dejectedly "Now the phone's gone and made itself all deaded!" 

Lana peered over the top of the counter at Chloe lying on the floor. "I wanna dance!" She exclaimed. 

"What's that got to do with the price of fish?" Chloe asked as she struggled to her feet. 

"What's the price of fish got to do with anything?" Lana replied with a confused look on her face. 

Chloe shrugged. "I'm hungry" she stated. 

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A/N: Please review! I'm a beginner and need feedback! Please let me know what you think! Go on, press da liddle button. Ya know ya wanna! 


	3. Chapter Three

A/N: Thanx heaps for all the reviews!!! I really appreciate each and every one of them! NB. chillian, no I'm not British, I'm Australian. Guess our slang can be fairly similar at times. As for the fact that no one uses the word 'whilst' I'd say that's probably global - I never claimed to be normal in fact I can assure you I'm not!!! (As this story demonstrates.) 

Anyhoo, enough chitchat, on with the fic... 

Chapter Three:

Clark pounded impatiently on the front door of the Luthor Mansion, careful not to smash his fist through the solid timber. He glanced back at his pickup truck, briefly wondering whether he should have turned the engine off. He was so impatient to get back to the Talon, that he had jumped out of the truck hoping that Lex would come with him straightaway and had left it running in hopes that they could get away quickly. Jumping restlessly from one foot to the other in agitation, Clark began to dance on the spot. The time it was taking for the door to open indicated that Lex's staff had already gone home for the night and Clark sent up a silent prayer that Lex himself was indeed in the mansion. Considering it was late on a Friday night, the resident billionaire could very well have travelled to Metropolis after finishing work that day. 

Lex growled at the noise of someone hammering on the front door insistently. He quickly threw his bathrobe around his body as he resigned himself to the fact that whoever it was, they were obviously not about to leave anytime soon. Any other night he could count on a fairly uninterrupted solitude, but tonight when he really needed to... After thinking all day about...and therein was the problem. He really should not need to get himself off after thinking all day about his plant manager's teenage daughter! Trying to push the snarky blonde from his thoughts for the umpteenth time that day, Lex made his way swiftly down to the front door. 

Clark had just raised his fist to hammer on the door for the last time, when it was pulled open abruptly by a disgruntled looking Lex Luthor. "Lex, I'm so sorry if I woke you up, I really need your help! There's an emergency and I couldn't think of any other way...and I needed to get in but they wouldn't let me, and I'm really sorry but I need the keys and if you could come too and help, it would be really great!" 

Lex blinked repeatedly at the information that had been thrust so suddenly at him in the form of Clark Kent's whirlwind explanation. "Clark, if you'd just slow down, I'm sure we can sort this out. Who wouldn't let you in where and why? What keys do you need and what's the emergency?" He asked in a calm voice. "Oh and I wasn't asleep. Though the next time you come banging on my door at all hours, I would appreciate it if you didn't leave dents in the woodwork. It's tiresome to have it re-carved and you wouldn't believe how rare that ancient English Oak actually is! The modern stuff just isn't the same." He smirked as Clark looked worriedly at the door. "Clark, I was just joking. Now, what's wrong?" 

Clark breathed a sigh of relief. For a moment he thought that he had let his agitation get the better of him and had failed to control his powers whilst pounding on the door. Suddenly recollecting why he was there, he began explaining the situation to Lex, "Lana and Chloe are at the Talon. They've gotten themselves drunk, although I don't know where they got the alcohol from." He frowned at this statement as though unable to comprehend why one would wish to obtain any in the first place. "I tried to get them to open the door but they wouldn't let me in. Then I remembered that you would have a key. So if you could come with me we could hopefully, between the two of us, manage to get them home." He looked at Lex imploringly. 

"Fine. I'll get the keys and meet you out front of the Talon," Lex replied with a quick nod of his head and hastily closed the door. 

Clark blinked for a second, surprised not only that Lex had agreed without further coaxing, but also that he had been so swift in acting. 'It's not as if he's very close to either Lana or Chloe,' Clark thought as he climbed back into the pickup. 'He must be worried about what they'll do to the Talon.' With that thought he pulled out of the gates of the manor and made his way back to the Talon. 

Lex cursed himself for agreeing to help Clark as soon as he had closed the door. 'Chloe Sullivan drunk. That's all I need to add fuel to my already rapidly growing fantasies about the girl.' He shook his head and moved towards his bedroom to change. Hopefully it would be Clark who would help the blonde reporter and he could focus on getting Lana home. Lex shook his head. 'Like there was even a chance of Clark not acting as Lana's hero,' he scoffed to himself. He tried to ignore the uncomfortable feeling in the pit of his stomach at the idea of Clark helping Chloe. No! He would simply help the girl get home and it would be over and done with! He was a Luthor, dammit and he could certainly handle one drunk teenager. Even if it _was_ an incredibly sexy, snarky teenager who had been plaguing his dreams. With that resolution made, Lex jumped into one of his numerous cars and sped off towards the Talon. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

After Lana's proclamation that she felt like dancing, Chloe had leapt at the idea and the two girls began dancing together. They had been grooving a few minutes before Chloe suggested that the situation could be improved further by the addition of music. Accordingly, the great music hunt of Smallville started. 

"Lana, you must have one a those thingies somewhere in this place. The moozic's comed here before!" 

"What's a thingie?" Lana asked the blonde with a puzzled look. 

"You know..." Chloe replied in exasperation as she waved her hands around frantically. "A thingie that plays the moozic! Wiv the knobs 'n stuff!" 

"Heehee. You said knobs!" Lana giggled. "I don't know what thingie you're talkin 'bout but I'm gonna put the raid-yo on!!!" She walked determinedly around the counter to the radio, or as determinedly as a smashed person _can_ walk. Chloe observed that she looked like someone had stuck something very unpleasant up her backside. Though on second thoughts, Chloe decided Lana generally looked like someone had stuck something very unpleasant up her backside. 

Having reached her destination, Lana, after a few false starts, turned on some music. Turning around she noticed that Chloe was nowhere in sight. "Chlo?" she called out in confusion. 

"Yep?" Turning in the direction that the voice was coming from, all Lana could see was a pair of boots sticking out from under one of the tables. 

"Watcha doin' down there? I thought we was gonna dance?" Lana asked as she bopped along to the music. 

"Well the floor kinda jumped up and then I thought 'I always come in here and look at the top of the tables. Then I thought that isn't very fair, coz the bottom's got just as much right to be looked at.' So I thought I'd look at the bottom of the tables. You know, so they don't get their feelins hurted." Lana didn't reply as she was too caught up in spinning around to the music. 

It was at this point that Lex and Clark walked in and beheld the two intoxicated girls. Turning quickly from the sight of Lana's spinning, Lex furrowed his brow and looked around for any sight of Chloe. Taking a few steps forward, he suddenly heard a rather off key voice directly underneath him belt out "I'm horny. Horny, horny, horny. So horny, I'm horny, horny, horny tonight!" Stepping back slightly, he looked down to observe the sight of Chloe's feet, sticking out from underneath the table, clicking their heels together as she attempted to sing along to the music. 

"Chloe, it's Lex. Come out from under the table, we're going to get you home!" Lex yelled, trying to be heard over the music. A thump followed by muffled swearing was the only answer he got. Crouching down, he tried again. "Chloe? It's Lex. Come out here!" 

"Lex?...did you get my phone call?" asked a muffled voice. "I didn't think you'd come coz the person who lived in the phone wouldn't stop humming at me and then the phone died." With these unintelligible words, a ruffled blonde head popped out from the table. It grinned wickedly up at him. "Lex. I've been naughty and need spankin. You'll have to come in and get me." As swiftly as it had appeared, the head was gone from view, and all that could be heard was the sound of delighted giggles floating up from the dark space beneath the table. 

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Ok I'm gonna be all redundant here - Please review!!! 


	4. Chapter Four

A/N: I'm sooo sorry for not updating this sooner! Real life can be a bitch, but it eventually buggered off for awhile so I could _finally_ write another chappy! God bless whoever came up with the idea of a consultation week at uni. I'm not entirely sure what it is, but due to it I don't have to go to uni this week! (do-dah, do-dah!) 

Thanx for the many lovely reviews I've received! Remember that if you have any criticisms, I'd be happy to hear them - they'll only make me stronger!!! 

I forgot to mention last chapter that I now have a wonderful Beta! As of chapter three, drina has been doing wonderful and fast betaing for me, so many thanks to her!!! 

Chapter Four:

Lex rocked back on his heels and deliberated on the situation before him. Having experienced more than most in his twenty-two years, he still found that nothing he had ever come across could help him in his current predicament. When asked about anything from Ancient Greek Literature to the Stock-Exchange, he could debate confidently on any issue; he solved important problems every day of his life. Yet, when faced with the dilemma of how to lure an inebriated teen out from under a table without giving into the temptation to take the girl right there on the floor of The Talon, he was stumped. 

During Lex's internal debating, the afore-mentioned inebriated teen obviously became tired of waiting to be "come and got" and slowly emerged from under the table. In glancing up, Lex beheld the sight of his X-rated dreams slowly crawling on hands and knees towards him. As he watched her approach with catlike stealth, he had the unmistakable feeling that he was being stalked. Accustomed to be the hunter and not the prey, Lex felt disconcerted. Yet uneasy as he was, he couldn't help admiring the view he had as Chloe crawled towards him. He watched as her breasts swayed enticingly inside the low-cut top that exposed her supple flesh to his gaze. 

Her back arched as she knelt inches away from him. Then licking her lips, Chloe slowly reached up to take Lex's head between her hands. She gradually brought it down towards her and dragged her tongue over the top of his smooth skull. 

Lex shivered as he felt her hot, wet tongue trail across his skin. Closing his eyes, he fought to retain what little self-control he had. Straightening, he caught Chloe around the waist and hauled her to her feet. Their bodies entangled as Lex strove to support her, and he found, to his dismay, that her body was now plastered to his. 'Oh Lord' he thought. 'She feels so good against me.' He swallowed with difficulty, finding his mouth had become as dry as sandpaper 'I have to ignore it,' he told himself. 'She's drunk and she'll kill me if I take advantage of her and then Clark, Pete and Gabe will mutilate my dead body while the paparazzi come and take pictures.' 

As he attempted to start moving Chloe towards the door, she began to nibble on his earlobe, running her tongue over the shell of his ear. "Mmmm...I've been such a bad girl Lexy," she whispered breathily. "I need you to spank me." Then grabbing his hands, she proceeded to place them on her butt. "Spank me Lexy, you know you wanna!" 

Lex shook his head, feebly wondering if this _was_ in fact one of his own X-rated dreams. Perhaps he had fallen asleep on his bed and Clark coming to the mansion had been an elaborate prelude to the action that was only now beginning. However, as soon as the thought entered his head, he dismissed it. No matter how improbable the situation was, he was definitely awake. The unmistakable feeling of Chloe's soft, pliant body pressed against his was too real, too tangible to be a figment of his imagination. 

His hands lingered on her arse before he forcefully snatched them away. "Chloe, if you don't stop this, you're really going to regret it later. Come on, let me take you home." 

Chloe pouted and gazed at him seductively through lowered lashes. "But I already told you - I'm naughty. Naughty girls don't do as they're told!" With this statement she flung her arms around Lex's neck and began peppering kisses along his powerful jaw. Then much to Lex's surprise, she abruptly pulled away from him. Dashing behind him swiftly, she smacked him lightly on his arse before darting quickly to the other side of The Talon. 

Before Lex could gather up his wits and chase after her, she clambered up onto a table and begun to gyrate slowly to the soft melody emanating from the radio. Lex stood rooted to the ground as he watched Chloe lifting her arms above her head and moving sensuously to the music. Her movements were hypnotic and Lex found himself entranced by the constant motion of her swaying body. The skirt she was wearing rode high up on her milky thighs and Lex roused himself as he realised that Chloe had hooked her thumbs under the material of the waistband and was gradually shimmying it over her hips. She had just begun to bend over and slip it down her thighs when Lex reached her. 

"Chloe! What the hell do you think your doing?" he demanded. Flustered from having to stop the actions he so much wanted to see, Lex reached up and grabbed her by the hips, swinging her back down to the ground. This act only caused Chloe's skirt to fall completely from her hips and pool in a bundle at her feet. 

"Tut, tut!" Chloe murmured, shaking her finger at him. "No need to be so impatient. You'll get to see everything!" She then proceeded to kneel in front of him and unbuckle his belt. 

Lex sucked in a deep breath and screwed his eyes up tightly as he prayed for some kind of miracle that would get him out of this predicament. His knees almost buckled as he felt Chloe's hands move to undo the button on his pants. Lex's hands began to move of their own accord and before he could stop himself, he felt his fingers running through Chloe's golden hair. Fighting the urge to push her head exactly wear he needed it, Lex clenched his hands into fists and forcefully pulled Chloe up from her position on the floor. 

This once again revealed to him the fact that her skirt had been discarded and she stood in front of him in lacy French knickers and her skimpy, low-cut top. 'Why the hell do things like this happen to me?' Lex wondered as he avoided thinking about what he would really like to be doing with the scantily clad female in front of him. 'Why couldn't I have got Lana instead? Her version of drunk is probably singing nursery rhymes and playing hopscotch.' As soon as the thought entered his head, Lex whipped around looking for Clark and Lana. An over-amorous and near-naked Chloe had driven any thought of the pair from his brain as soon as he had entered the coffee house. 

He heard a car door slam outside and let out the breath he had not realised he had been holding. Thank God Clark had not been in the room when Chloe had started her impromptu strip show. Lex refused to dwell on the reason why he was so relieved that he had been the only male to receive Chloe's advances. It was not like the girl had any hold over him. His fixation on her was purely physical. He would have reacted exactly the same way to any other attractive female who happened to prance around half-naked in front of him. Except of course, anybody else in Smallville, where he'd found no one to interest him. Oh, and Metropolis - been there, done them! In fact anyone throughout most of the country and in quite a few of the other continents he had been to around the world. Lex furrowed his brow. '...of course I've never been to Antarctica' he thought defensively. 

Hearing the front door of the Talon open, Lex turned to find Clark standing in the doorway. He opened his mouth to offer Clark an explanation as to why his friend was sporting less clothing than a catwalk model but before he could, Chloe hollered at Clark. "Oi! You don't 'av a condom onya by any chance do ya?" She shook her head "'course not, what 'm I thinking? See Clark, when two people like each other..." Lex tuned out her lesson on what two people who liked each other could get up to, as he reflected with amusement on the difference in Chloe's tone when she was talking to him. It was extraordinary the way she could turn from sex-kitten to bellowing barmaid in a matter of seconds. "...and so if she's flexible enough, he should be able to enter from an angle." Lex shook his head bemusedly as he heard the end of Chloe's account. To think, he'd always considered her to be fairly sheltered! 

Lex looked once again at Clark and had to stop himself from laughing at the look of horror on Clark's face. The laughter died on his lips however, when he observed Clark's eye's travel down Chloe's scantily clad body. "Where's Lana?" he demanded in a harsh voice. 

"Oh yeah! I just came to tell you that I managed to get her into the truck and I'll be driving her home now." His eyes wandered slowly over Chloe's form again. "You need any help?" 

"We're fine Clark. You just go back to Lana and we'll be following shortly." Lex had to force himself not to bodily force the boy out the door. 

"Well if your sure I can't help..." Clark reiterated as he reluctantly tore his gaze from Chloe's body. 

"I'm sure!" Lex's tone held an authority that was impossible to miss and Clark quickly backed out the door, leaving Lex and Chloe alone. 

As the door slammed closed, Chloe slunk over to Lex and smoothed her hands over his chest. "Oh goody. Now we're alone, the fun can _really_ begin!" 

~~~~~~~~~~ 

A/N: I know this was a bit different to the first three chaps but I had to pound my muse to get anything at all out of her. She's currently in a state of exhaustion and was last seen heading for a hot spa to revive!  
  
  
~ so what're ya waitin for huh? Go! Review! Shoo! 


	5. Chapter Five

A/N: I'm crossing my fingers that no one drops dead from the shock that YES, I'm _actually_ updating!!! I know, I can hardly believe it myself!!! Did I mention that my muse is an overweight, middle-aged chain-smoking man named Norm who is never sober enough to actually inspire me? No? Well he is, so blame him for my tardiness in updating!   
  
Anyhoo, thanx to Aimee for inspiring me enough to actually write again! And as always thanx to my wonderful beta drina for being so quick at betaing!!!

Chapter Five:

As Chloe ran her hands up Lex's chest he decided that he could not take this pleasurable torture anymore, so he grabbed her round the waist and hauled her body over his shoulder. He swiftly marched out through the front of the Talon, turning briefly to lock the door, then made his way over to the car. 

Lex cursed the fact that the interior of his car was so small, as at this point, he needed to be as far away from Chloe Sullivan as possible. As he buckled the inebriated teen into the passenger seat, she looked up at him with a sexy pout. "Where we goin' Lexy? I thought we were gonna have some fun!" 

"Aah, ...we are!" Lex stated running his palm over the back of his head in agitation. "I'm just taking you somewhere more comfortable!" He decided the best way to keep her in the car was to let her think that he was going along with her. 

This tactic worked for all of 1 minute until Chloe's mind - and hands - started to wander. It was all Lex could do to keep his eyes on the road as he felt her leaning close to him and begin to blow into his ear. Chloe leaned as far as she could towards Lex before she was hampered by the seatbelt. Whimpering slightly, she pouted as she began to wrestle with the "belty-thingy". 

'Thank God!' Lex thought as her attention was distracted away from seducing him as she struggled to undo the belt. Lex thanked whoever had invented the seatbelt as he knew from experience that it was impossible to contend with when under the influence of alcohol. 

No sooner had he finished this thought than he noticed that Chloe had succeeded in undoing the device. With a triumphant grin she lunged at Lex, causing the car to swerve across the road dangerously. Lex fought to regain control of the vehicle, and finally managed to get them back onto the right side of the road. Glancing over to the passenger's seat, he was alarmed to see that it was empty. 'Oh fuck! What if she's hurt?' was the first thing to enter his head, as his gut clenched at the idea of her being harmed. 

"Did you know that peanuts aren't actually nuts?" floated Chloe's voice from the back seat. "They're legoo-legoos, umm you know that word that like ummm those thingy whatsomecalleds are?" 

Lex blinked in astonishment and glanced in his rear vision mirror to see Chloe sitting quite contentedly on the floor behind his seat. She was holding a stray bag of peanuts in her hand and squinting at them in concentration. Lex's shoulders slumped in relief and he ran a hand over his face wearily. 

"Legumes?" He supplied. 

"That's it!" Chloe bounced on the floor where she was sitting. "They're not nuts, they're legumes!" She grinned happily and went back to work trying to open the packet. Lex sighed, relieved that she had found something other than him to occupy herself with. 

"I wanna peanut!" Chloe pouted as she tossed the bag to the ground, having been unable to open it. "And why was _'Peanuts'_ called _'Peanuts'_ anyway?" she asked in an accusatory tone. "I never 'member there bein' any peanuts... just Charlie Brown and that dog!...and dat little yellow bird...and dat kid wiv a blanky!..and some ova kids! I like peanuts," she continued to prattle. "They're salty. I like salt. Did you know that skin is salty? I bet you're salty! Mmm... I wanna lick you, Lexy! I wanna lick you all over, salty-man!" She began to rise up and lean over his seat. Lex let out a sigh of relief that they had finally reached her house. 

He turned the engine off and looked back at Chloe. "We're home. Come on, Chloe, let's get you inside!" 

Chloe pouted and shook her head fervently. "But I wanna go to your place! There's more room for our _fun_ there!" she said running her hands up Lex's torso suggestively. 

"Come on, Chloe, just get out of the car!" Lex demanded, losing his patience. 

"We need to get you up to bed." Lex nearly groaned when he realised what he had just said, and exactly how the drunk blonde would interpret it. 

Chloe's eyes immediately gleamed and she reached up to put her arms around Lex's neck. "Why don't you carry me there, baby?" she whispered huskily into his ear. 

Lex sighed and considered his options. At least if he carried her, he would be able to get her inside quickly. Yet, the act of carrying her would increase their bodily contact and he was not sure if that was something he could handle at this moment. Making his decision, he swung her up over his shoulder, figuring that this way, at least her body would not be pressed against certain crucial parts of body. Lex had however forgotten the fact that Chloe was still partially undressed due to her impromptu striptease. He was forcefully reminded of the fact when he found himself staring at her tight little arse, clad only in her skimpy French knickers, barely inches away from his face. 

Nearly growling with desire, Lex gathered up every ounce of his self-control and forced himself to move towards the house. Finding the door unlocked he went inside quickly and moved towards the stairs. As he began to climb the first step he was unable to suppress a moan as he felt Chloe's small hands run down his back and cup his arse, massaging his cheeks. Determining to deposit her as soon as possible in her room and make his getaway, he sped up the stairs and reached the hallway. Looking at the doors, he hesitated slightly. He could hear some muffled singing coming from the room to his right. Assuming that it was Lana's room, where Clark was still trying to put her to bed, he approached the door slightly to his left and pushed it open. 

Switching the light on, he was relieved to see that he had in fact chosen Chloe's bedroom. Immediately swinging the girl down onto her bed he gulped as he watched her stare at him provocatively. She stretched out upon the bed and arched her back, moaning his name throatily. Before Lex could gather his wits up to stop her, she had pulled her shirt over her head and flung it onto the floor. Breathing heavily, he found himself physically unable to tear his eyes away as she moved her hands down her body slowly and sensually. He watched as she slowly unzipped her boots, staring into his eyes the entire time. She slid the boots down off her legs and then laid back once more on the bed. Lex swallowed with difficulty as he was now presented with Chloe spread out erotically in only her underwear. 

With torturous effort, Lex closed his eyes and turned around. He clenched his jaw and balled his hands into fists at his side, then with excruciating slowness, began to step towards the door. Quick as lightning, Chloe shot off the bed and flung herself at his back. Latching onto his shoulders, she twisted her legs around his waist and clung onto his body. 

"Baby, you can't leave me. I want you so much! Now that I've finally got you here, you can't just go!" she murmured into his ear. Lex shuddered from the feeling of her lips on his ear, and attempted to swallow. His mouth had become completely dry, and it took a great deal of effort to answer her. 

"Chloe. Go back to bed. You need to get some sleep. We'll talk about this in the morning." he said in a monotone. 

"But I've wanted you for so long, Lex!" Chloe replied, nuzzling into his neck. "You have no idea of how many nights I go to sleep with my fingers inside me and your name on my lips. I want you, and I want you now!" 

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A/N: Once again, thanx to everyone who has reviewed. I hope you'll keep reading and continuing to review. I know I may take awhile to actually update, but without your reviews I probably wouldn't update at all! So thanx for that. Knowing that people actually want to keep reading this is what makes me want to keep writing it! So if you haven't reviewed yet and you want more, please press the little mauve button and tell me. Even if you don't like it, tell me why and what you think would make it better! 


	6. Chapter Six

A/N: Ok now peoples take a deep breath, close your eyes and concentrate on breathing. Now the next step is very important. Open your eyes again otherwise you won't be able to read the rest of this a/n ;-) Make sure you're sitting down. If you suffer from a weak heart I advise you to look away..........yes, _I'm actually updateing_!!!   
  
I had about a third of this written straight after my last update but the rest refused to get written. So don't blame me. Blame my brain. Or better yet, blame my folks - I was born like this.  
  
Once again much thanx to drina for her betaing. Thanx also to everyone who has left feedback. I know I'm really slow at updating, but just knowing that people are actually reading this and enjoying it makes me want to make the effort and write. So thanx for that.

BTW the R rating starts to come into effect more in this chap. Sorry I'll shut up now and let you get on with the story! 

Chapter Six.

Chloe moved her hand down to cup Lex's growing erection through the material of his pants. "I know that you want me too. You want to be buried in my tight, hot, wet body as I scream your name and convulse around you." 

Without warning, Lex turned and suddenly threw Chloe onto the bed. He practically pounced on her and began to ravish her mouth furiously. His hands were everywhere at once, running all over her body, drawing squeals of pleasure and moans of desire from Chloe. 

Panting heavily, Lex forced himself to slow down and savour the experience he had dreamt of for so long. He lifted his upper body slightly above Chloe's and stared down at her face. He marvelled at the smouldering depths of her hazel eyes which, lit with desire, blazed a beautiful emerald green. Bringing his hand up, he gently caressed her cheek with his thumb. "So beautiful..." he murmured, before lowering his mouth to trail the path his fingers had traced along her jaw. His tongue lightly drawing across her hot flesh, he licked his way ever so slowly down her neck. Chloe's body shuddered beneath his at the feel of his careful ministrations. "So sexy..." he whispered against her throat and continued to kiss and lick his way downwards until he was hampered by her bra.  


He moved his head up and licked Chloe's bottom lip, moving his lips against hers with a gentle pressure. His tongue darted out, asking for entrance with soft probing strokes against the seam of her lips. Chloe parted her lips and Lex began gradually deepening the kiss. As their kiss became increasingly more passionate, he reached around her to undo the garment which hid her breasts from his view. Their tongues danced and massaged each other, starting a rhythm that their bodies began to echo. Both unconsciously pressing their bodies as close as possible to each other they moved against each other in the dance that was as old as time itself. Bringing his hands back around to the front of Chloe's body, Lex slowly drew the bra down over her arms and threw it onto the floor. Chloe whimpered at the loss of bodily contact as Lex drew himself away from her to gaze at her exposed breasts. 

Reverently, he reached out his hand to cup the underside of her right breast in his palm. Drawing his calloused thumb over her soft milky flesh, he carefully avoided her sensitive nipples. She squirmed underneath him in exquisite torment, as she attempted to get him to pay attention to the distended buds. Lex lowered his head and ran his tongue along the smooth flesh and began to massage the silky globe with his lips and tongue. 

He started by running his tongue in a circular motion, slowly working his way closer and closer to his goal. Chloe continued to writhe beneath him, urging him to reach his target as soon as possible. Her body jerked in pleasure as his mouth finally latched greedily upon her dusky nipple. Taking the turgid peak in between his teeth, Lex bit down upon the tender flesh, eliciting a sharp cry from Chloe. He lathed his tongue on the sensitive nub before sucking gently upon it. 

Meanwhile his skillful hands were far from being idle. His left hand was paying homage to her other breast, echoing the actions of his mouth upon its twin. The deft fingers trailed upon her sensitive skin, leaving a trail of fire wherever they made contact. His fingers and palm massaged the globe of her breast touching every possible inch of her skin whilst remaining tantalisingly out of reach of the exact spot which cried out to be kneaded so skillfully. 

Lex's right hand flitted over Chloe's torso, barely touching her skin as he skimmed slowly down her side. Passing softly over her ribs, his fingers continued their leisurely path down towards the soft skin of her belly. His hand stopped its downward journey briefly to tease her navel before continuing to trace its way down her lower belly until its progress was impeded by the lacy material of her panties. 

Chloe moaned at the multiple stimuli she was subjected to. She tried to concentrate on the incredible sensations of Lex's mouth sucking greedily on one of her nipples but found herself distracted by the equally glorious feelings that both of his hands were creating. She gasped as his hands drew slowly down over the material of her panties. She unconsciously spread herself wider in anticipation of the feel of his fingers upon the place she had craved him for months. She bucked her hips, endeavouring to hurry his deliberate and unhurried movement. Feeling his fingers make contact with her wet heat through the material, she cried out and pushed harder against him. 

"Oh Lex, that's sooo good. Mmm yeah right there. Oh! Lord I want you so much!" she murmured brokenly, as she tossed her head from side to side on the pillow. 

Lex grinned to himself as broke away from his ministrations on her nipples to watch her reaction to his fingering. 'If I can get this reaction by merely running my fingers over her panties, imagine what I can get her to do when I actually enter her!' Lex felt himself grow even harder than he would have thought possible with the image of Chloe completely out of control because of him. 

He took in the flushed skin of her neck and breasts and the beads of sweat forming all over her body in one satisfied glance before lowering his body back down over her. He began kissing her once again feverishly when he was startled by the sound of the door bursting open. 

"Lex! What the hell do you think you're doing?" Clark yelled as he took in the sight of Chloe, naked but for a pair of scanty knickers, spread on her bed underneath Lex panting and moaning. Noting in one glimpse the actions of Lex's hands and mouth, he furiously tore forward and heaved Lex up off the bed. Glancing down at the prone form of his best friend, who until this night he had never even regarded as female, he felt himself harden before he could control himself. 'God but she was beautiful!' He thought before reigning his thoughts back to the situation at hand. 

"You bastard!" he screamed as he tossed his friend out of Chloe's bedroom. Turning back to Chloe, he reached and covered her all but naked form with a sheet. 

"Oh Clark, piss off will you!!!" Chloe grated out at him "I was finally gonna get fucked by my Lexy and you had to come along and ruin it!" she scowled up at him fiercely. "Why can't you just go bugger your cows and leave the two of us alone?" she murmured before drifting off into unconciousness. 

Clark shook his head as he watched Chloe fall asleep. Now...to find that bastard who had taken advantage of her. He cracked his knuckles as he thought about what he would like to do to Lex at the moment, then made his way out of the room to hunt for his prey. 

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A/N: I hope this chap made up in some shape of form for my shocking delay in updating. If you've made the effort to read this far then please make just a little bit more effort and tell me why you've read this far. Even if it was just coz you hated it so much you couldn't tear your gaze away! I appreciate all reviews, no matter their content! 


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